It funny how the older I get, the more cautious I am about friendships. Is this the self-fulfilling claim of my increasing cynicism and skeptism towards people and their motives? Why is it that trust is such a hard thing to give out now. Seriously, people who are too kind sometimes scare me.

Friendships made now seem like such a fragile entity. The workings of it could be considered somewhat childish too - you liked me yesterday, how about today, etc...I miss the certainty, the security. There are of course some friendships I just know is real. I know for certain that the gang from HSC won't ditch me one day. I know that they love me and would always want the best for me. This feeling is mutual.

I'm so sick of having to question new friendships made now, knowing that once situations change, we'd probably only see one another about once a semester or not at all. Sometimes, people are too busy going through life. I know that. I understand. But I still wish for the time when I knew, probably immediately, that this person was in for real.....